Martin is furious with Frasier when he spills the secrets of his father's love life on the air.
Homer leads a vigilante group to catch the Springfield Cat Burglar, who then robs the museum.
George is charmed by Elaine's new boyfriend; Kramer thinks Jerry's new girlfriend is his phone-sex mate.
King John aims to tunnel to Scunthorpe but the locals are horrified as Scunthorpe dwellers have two heads. Rose and Guy aim to raise cash with a phoney ransom by pretending that Marian has kidnapped Guy,who goes off to the forest. As part of the plan Marian and Rose are tied together and are pelted with mud by the villagers,who assume they are a two-headed monster from Scunthorpe.
Randy loses a sled race to Vinnie. But after following Tim's advice of racing Vinnie again with a better sled, Randy sprains his arm. Meanwhile, Brad contemplates stopping his saxophone lessons.
The fraternity ostracizes Steve because many people believe that he escaped punishment for the break-in by squealing on others. John refuses to allow Steve any playing time on the intramural volleyball team. Steve becomes fed up and accuses John of tipping off the cops. The KEG house holds a ceremony to decide which of the two should be forced from the house. John arrogantly confesses to his friend Keith, who sides with Steve. This gives the remaining members the courage to vote against John. Dylan bonds with Erica and offers to loan Suzanne money to get her back on her feet. He offends Suzanne when he follows Jim's advice and asks for her social security number. They apologize for the misunderstanding, and Erica secretly gets Dylan the information. D'Shawn begins to pay attention to his studies after a lecture from his sister. He tears up his knee in his first game, but passes his sociology final without assistance.
Billy tells Amanda that he and Alison are back together. Amanda responds by removing Alison from the Microcomp account because she was romantically involved with the client. Amanda moves forward with her plans to evict Jake, but Jo refuses to testify against him. Amanda relents when she needs Jake's help with a plumbing problem. Palmer confesses his guilt to Amanda and skips town. She goes back to Jake. Jo goes to her ten-year high school reunion and runs into Reed, an old boyfriend who has just been released from prison. He later turns up at her apartment. Michael has a breakthrough at a physical therapy session, and regains the use of his legs. Sydney is busted for prostitution. Michael bails her out and agrees to keep quiet if she helps him break up Jane and Robert.
An emaciated elderly woman is found dead of an apparent heart attack and her granddaughter is charged with neglect and grave indifference to human life.
Roseanne joins a women's club in hopes of establishing useful contacts, leaving D.J. high and dry with a weird classmate whose mother also belongs. Meanwhile, Mark drops a bombshell on Becky when Dan discovers that he has dropped out of school.
While Martinez investigates a series of robberies involving a fake ATM machine, Kelly's current case yields evidence that links Licalsi to the mob. Meanwhile, Lt. Fancy tries to extend his custody of a young boy whose mother is in a drug rehabilitation program.
Hayden is rattled when he and Christine agree to watch an infant for the weekend.
Stephanie's classmate Jamie, who plays guitar with some friends in a band called "Human Pudding", asks Stephanie out on a date to the Smash Club, and Stephanie excitedly agrees to go to the Smash Club with Jamie. Stephanie's classmate Gia Mahan is not as excited, because Gia also has her eyes on Jamie, and she's not about to let Stephanie have him that easily. In order to make Jamie cancel his date with Stephanie, Gia spreads a false rumor at school that Stephanie wouldn't have any dates if she didn't pay guys to date her. Gia's plan works, and Jamie breaks the date, so Stephanie gets even with Gia by hanging up a blowup of Gia's awful report card in the hallway. This makes Gia feel even more hurt than Stephanie felt when Gia spread the false rumor about Stephanie. Noticing how hurt Gia feels makes Stephanie feel guilty.
With Mike gone and in need of money for a trip to Cancun, Zack and the gang stage a rave in the dorm.
A cleverly constructed shape on canvas! Peek through the panes with artist Bob Ross and share a beautiful snowy day outside.
Disaster is on the ballot when Harlan and Ima both run for mayor.
An agent stops by to see Ed about his idea for "The Shaman" but he wants a few "little" changes made to better sell the script. Chris seeks to discover his feminine side. Joel and Maggie "discuss" motherhood. Shelly flees her baby shower as all the pressures of motherhood begin to show themselves to her, when Eve and others tell their child birthing experiences.
Will pays for putting off studying for a midterm until the last minute, and Ashley pays for staying out late on her first date.
Newspaper columnist Dave Barry deals with everyday life in the suburbs.
City Commissioner Strand is desperate to get the Viper on the road. He plans on using the Viper's crime-fighting abilities to bolster support for his campaign to become mayor. After stealing a satellite, Michael Payton flips his black Dodge Stealth in a spectacular crash. Strand hears about the accident and has Payton pronounced dead at the scene. Payton is the best getaway driver the Outfit had. Commissoner Strand orders that Payton's memory be erased and his appearance altered. When Payton awakes, he is told that he is a police officer named Joesph Payne Astor.